Inability to Do a Vulcan Salute: A Sad But True Tale

Update: We'll miss you, Leonard Nimoy (1931-2015).

Most ladies who grew up on Star Trek have a thing for the charming, suave, debonaire Captain Kirk. William Shatner was my mom's TV crush. She's not alone. Kirk left the girls swooning. But I'll be honest with you, he does nothing for me. Serving under Kirk might have made me go insane.

Don't get me wrong here. The chance to serve on the Enterprise would have overcome any disgruntled feelings I had about Kirk's personality. I would have sucked up my complaints and done my duty. But I would not have fallen for Kirk at first glance the way so many of the TV show characters did.

That's not to say I don't love William Shatner. I do. And it's not that I wouldn't have swooned. I would have. But not for Kirk. For Spock.

SPOCK?!

Yes, Spock. The Vulcan with the pointy ears. The "green-blooded hobgoblin" as McCoy called him. (Oh, Bones, I love you too!)

Spock is handsome and calm and smart and... wonderful. I like other Vulcans too! T'pol from Enterprise is fascinating (pun intended) to me! I love the story between her and Trip Tucker. The stories we learn about Spock's parents, Sarek and Amanda, are moving and intriguing. Have you seen the TNG episodes I'm talking about? Again, FASCINATING.

When the Star Trek reboot, which is in itself an entirely separate discussion, killed off Spock's mother, I threw a tantrum. I still do every time I think about it. My husband Jeremy thinks I have a problem. I DO! THEY KILLED SPOCK'S MOM!!

This changes everything.

But not the fact that despite years of effort, I cannot do a proper Vulcan salute. You know, the "live long and prosper" thing they say when they do the hand sign.

This:

(credit: Wikipedia)

My fingers just don't do that. Maybe I have a disability or something but I really can't do it.

See my failed attempts. This is honestly as good as it gets. Fail.

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